Archive for 'Uncategorized'
Just in case you’re wondering what i look like every day…it’s this.
(it is not this.)
Listen. It’s not all sexy time and hundred dollar bills around here. Actually, it’s never that, to my knowledge. What I’m saying is that sometimes I over-romanticize things that are not at all…well, romantic. Such as being an organized human who launders her things with care and spends time matching her socks before throwing them into the drawer.
Maybe I’d feel more zen, maybe I’d go to the gym more, maybe I’d end up starting a mommy blog someday about cool cleaning tricks and ways to stay on top of the housework and Martha Stewart would mention me in interviews with a small shake of her head and a misty-eyed, “How does she do it?”
But until then, for all of you James Dean wannabes if you’ve never tried throwing caution to the wind and tossing all of your singlet socks into the drawer, naked and unmatched, I highly suggest it.
Friend: “Ooh I like your hair! What do you call this?”
Me: “Umm…’I slept with my hair in a braid’ or ’I didn’t wash my hair today.’ “
And scene. Pure glamour, people. Pure. Glamour.
The above headline is proof that I went to a blogging conference where they told me the keys to a click-able headline.
Can you guess any of the devices?
Oh, and lying wasn’t supposed to be one of them.
P.s. but seriously, the Killer Tribes conference was really, really good.
I really want to start writing for restaurants/coffee shops/bars/saloons/medieval times.
Naming menu items, signage, writing menu descriptions, eating free food…you get it.
A few drink names I thought of over the weekend WHILE WATCHING MY JAYHAWKS GET TO THE FINAL FOUR! (ahem, sorry, excited. still.)
- Boom Chaco Latte (like boom shakalaka, people.)
- Vanilla Ice, Ice Latte.
- Al Cappuccino (mobsters drink coffee too.)
- Mocha Money, Mo Problems
- Gimme, Gimme Mocha
- Cafe Ole (a spanish cafe au laite?)
- Americano Dream
- Don’t Be Chai
- Espresso Yourself
- Americano Espresso Card. ( Sponsored by American Express.) (And yes, I know that an Americano contains Espresso. Just let me have my fun)
Weird title for a heterosexual female? Nah. It’s me you guys. Pshh.
I was thinking the other day about how I over-relate to pop-culture princesses (I immediately regret that aliteration.) I, like any good fanatic or celebrity stalker, think somewhere deep down that I am a lot like the people and characters I watch on TV.
A few of them, at least.
Namely the following:
- Jess from New Girl. Let’s just say I am no stranger to singing made up songs to and about myself, making awkward situations worse, and generally being really, irresistibly lovable.
- Bethenny (yeah we’re on a first name only basis, what do you make of it?!?!) I’ve mentioned her husband here before. And yes part of why I relate to her is because I want a husb like that. But more it’s because she is a total nutcase. In the best, most entertaining, entrepreneurial way of course.
- Mindy Kaling. She loves writing in silly lists. She is a comedy writer for television (ok at least a tiny part of that is true about me,) and she doesn’t care what you think about the way she dresses. Oh, and her portrayal of Kelly Kapur is beyond subtle-y genius. This, and many other reasons (like the photo on the back of her book) makes her my hero.
I think that’s enough for now. For you and for me. I can’t tell if I think too highly of them or myself. Fun quandary Friday!
What celeb/character are you the most like? Does Glamour already have a quiz for this?
I came up with the perfect title for my book:
I’m Having a Great Time
Or The Girl with No Pants On or My Life in Parenthesis or Cool Lists, Bro
The second subtitle is in hopes that The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo fans will assume it’s part of the series and buy it blindly. Brilliant marketing if you ask me.
Great. Now my voicemail is going to fill up with desperate publishers,
What’d you do over the holiday weekend?
Me? I ate ice cream out of a coffee mug.
That’s right. Throwing off every unsuspecting person I was with, I had ice cream in a non-bowl.
“What’s in there, coffee?”
“Hey, are you making tea?”
“WHAT’S GOING ON HERE?”
Mayhem. Chaos. Ice cream. In a mug.
That’s how crazy I got. You?